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The "presence of awareness". I connected immediately with that. When I read the words, I felt them.

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My mind will be quiet when IT wants to (as if it's separate from ME). I have severe insomnia (again last night) as my mind wouldn't shut the hell up as it was insisting on working out an art issue I'm having on a soon to be started piece. It, my mind that I don't/can't control was trying out many different scenarios on what to do with this new piece-to-be. I kept telling it to shut up, OK I'll try your suggestions whenever, I won't forget them, leave me the hell alone and let me sleep. Sometimes it's on overdrive and all I want is quiet and to be left alone. Damn, I sound like a schitzo.

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What works for me when I lay down is to start by telling myself that: Whatever there is to do or think about, now is not the time. Now is the time to, like I say to myself, 'get horizontal'. I have nothing else to do but just relax and watch myself breathe. Then I count my breaths and see how many I can count and then pretty soon I am gone off to dreamland. So yes, you can stop yourself from thinking. Just keep coming back to counting breaths. If you lose count because you got distracted by thought, you simply start over. It's a game. I guess like counting sheep but better to count breaths. It is physical and observational and hence grounding. It is meditational. In my early Sufi training you spend as much time as possible watching your breath and counting them. A lot of times it is coupled with a 'wazifa' or a phrase or word to help stay consciously aware of breath. If you are sensitive enough you can count heartbeats maybe up to 99. Sometimes the awareness is increased with fingering a string of beads along with breath and phrase. Doing this as a constant practice, which some people do for extended periods, weeks or months or even years, deep concentration is developed and control of the mind. Or just use the breath - so minimal and direct and secret

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I can try that. Thank you for the suggestions. I'll just have to argue with my brain and hopefully try to win the fights. Thank you Cecil.

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That’s a beautiful and clear piece of writing Cecil, thank you. I really enjoyed reading it. I remember an older person advising me in college when I was stressing about not having ideas that you have to think of the hen sitting on her eggs…she doesn’t keep getting off them to check if they’re hatching. She sits, waits, and trusts the process! Same thing with planting bulbs in the autumn or spring, you don’t keep digging them up to see are they growing. And then, just like magic, they appear.

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yes, those are good analogies. A lot of times it is just about holding an idea in mind long enough for the deeper intuitive imagination to work it out. And often you still wont quite have it until your hands are working it out which, as I have said in a different article, your hands have their own mind when they are communicating with the tools and materials.

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I like the hen on eggs metaphor. Patience is the key here, something I lack much of.

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Like I have said before, "Patience is a quality that can only be developed once you have run out of it."

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